There once was a wizard named Gandalf,
Who fought the Dark Lord to a stand off,
Then the lad from the shire,
Brought the ring to the fire,
But Gollum bit poor Frodo’s hand off.
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Cardboard Rhino 
There once was a hobbit named Frodo,Domestic as ol' Quasimodo,When he left with the ring,And first heard the Elves sing,He cried, \”Kansas this ain't, uncle Toto!\”(As with almost all my rhino contributions, this can only be fully appreciated by Tom.)
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Very nice. Very nice indeed.
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another –There once was a rotter named Gollum,And Hobbits was his biggest prollum,He wanted the ring,So he bit off the fing,Not knowing what next would befall'im!
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Aragorn was a very fell knightWho never backed down from a fightHe helped guard the ringSo they named him the kingNow he chills in the city of white
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A good friend is Tom BombadilloHe knows how to school Old Man WillowHe'll draw you a tubAnd feed you good grubAnd save you from barrow-wights chillo.
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First of all, cogoo, thank you for reminding me of important things.Secondly, coho, your second poem is a masterpiece and I will now only refer to fingers as fings
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There once was a jerk named Bill FernyWho sold a way overpriced pernyIt did as it shouldAnd carried stuff goodIn the end it was worth all the merny
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There once was a homeboy called DenethorWho was pretty sure he couldn't take no more.He built a big fireAnd his guards were like, \”Sire?\”,But then Gandalf knocked that fool's ass to the floor.-Laura
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I agree that Conor's second is a kingly limerick and great additions by Tom, Laura and Cristy. We have not seen the end of this thread.
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There once was a gardener named SamWho lived many months on the \”lam\”He kept watch and he cookedAfter Frodo he lookedAnd of salt he kept just a few grams.
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There once was a barmaid named RosyWith Sam, she was known to get cozyThey cavorted and datedBut Sam hesitatedTill the war gave him strength to proposey
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nice paw. nice, all. Laura's line, \”And his guards were like, 'Sire?'\” is a brilliant way to pack a lot of meaning into a short line. Here be a couple of 'em, if'n ye don't mind:O Galadriel was a fair Queen!Yea, the fairest that Gimley had seen!Yea, so fair, he decreed,That if you disagreed,He would bring down his axe on your bean!and–Said Dwarf Gimley to Elf Legolas:If our victory should come to pass,I'll indeed (if need be)Go to Fangorn with thee,But Helm's Deep will be much higher-class!
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In Mordor, dwelt Shelob the Spider.Foul creature, a stinker and biter.The Ring-bearer was brung her,Then Sam, with Sting stung her,So she squelched in a hole, hope she died ther.
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I also tried a Gimli/Galadriel limerick but couldn't get it to come out right. Nice going coggy
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Mom, your limerick reads like one that was written by hobbits
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There once was a dwarf lord called Thorin,Who thought being an exile was borin'.So he gathered a groupOf his buddies to scoopUp his gold from a dragon a-snorin'
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Many happy posts here. Cristy's lovely \”with Sting her stung her\”, Conor's Gimli poem is perfection, start to finish as is the Legolas/Gimili poem, and I love Tom's Thorin/Borin'/Snorin' combo. These are fun to write and fun to read.
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Sauron's Last Writings: A TrilogyListen folks it's a terrible thingFor a grown man to misplace his ringA foul creature once had itThen lost it dagnabbitAnd now I must find the halflingWith my palantir I can now seeThat my precious ring comes back to meSoon we'll be unitingThen the king I'll be fightingAnd the world will go dark to my glee!We'll all of my plans just went \”boom\”Because Gollum fell into Mount DoomAragorn overacted And kept me distractedNow it's I who'll end up in a tomb
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The Witch King he drove his Fell Beast, On Snowmane intending to feast.The prophecies tell him,That no man can fell him,His bane, the Stern Maid who rode East.
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Good ones! I love thinking of sauropod saying dagnabbit
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Jokey limericks are the best
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Made me laff
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Do another one, Laura!
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Sauron
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A sauropod is also fun to imagine saying dagnabbit.Dad, I'm a big fan of your revisionist middle earth history
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Oops that should've been Cogoo
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me too
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The elf they call Cirdan once spokeOf the ancient aggressors he smote.His listeners listenedtil a short intermissionthen said \”Shut up and build me a boat.\”
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I loveth the tale of the Maid who slew the King.
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I had to look up Cirdan to understand this, but I was rewarded for my labor. Well done.
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Saruman had a deadly diseaseHe forsaketh his forest of treesTheir limbs dislocatedThey rose irritatedAnd brought the white whiz to his knees
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I remember back when I had powerAnd overlooked all from my towerThen those filthy old shrubsCame at me with their clubsAnd forced me, as Sharkey, to cower
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Me three
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Love this entry by Barry!
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Anduril, the flame of the west,was a sword that some might call the best.While its wielder was happyhis sword was so snappy,it left many orcs quite depressed.
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A hobbit, by name Bilbo Baggins,Loved the life that a hobbit imagines,Till some dwarves and a wizardBlew through like a blizzardAnd dragged him off hunting for dragons!
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Cirdan Limerick!
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Gandalf G left a message in Bree,''Twas forgot by ol' Barliman B,So the Hobbits were late,When they got to the gate,But things worked out okay in the E.
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In a gentleman’s armor arrayed inRode Rohan’s most famous Shield MaidenThere was so much to carryFor behind her was MerryOn a horse that was heavily laden
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one of my faves
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I'm finding these addictive. Here's one from the toes:Once, a keen ladykiller called Striker,(Must have been an ancestor of Riker),Had to say, \”Eowyn,I can not be your man.\”(But it wasn't cuz he didn't like her.)
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I can't stop thinking of Limericks either!Good job rhyming Eowyn, I have been stuck on that. But you must be sleepy cos it's Strider and that don't rhyme with Riker, rewrite!
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I'm also feeling addicted. Good to see life on the Rhino. So many worthy contribution, including Conor's straight from the toes story of Striker [sic].
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Radagast was a wizard in brownIn his way, his assisted the crownHe alerted the seagulls,the pigeons and eaglesTo help bring the white wizard down
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I like this one a lot
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There once was a dwarf realm called Moriathat was loaded with mithril and warriorsBut they delved way too deepAnd they dug up a creepCalled a Balrog. There's some bad luck for ya.
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The Balrog poem is mighty indeed. The rhymes are grand.
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Drat! I realized that this morning.I don't think it can be salvaged. I knew it was too good to be true.
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Me too, this is your best yet paw.
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Mine too. Quite clever.
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